UZMA AUSAF suggests how students and/or their parents can overcome their depression if the students, however diligent and however best efforts they might have put in, do not come up to the parentsâ expectations.
The sky has not fallen if some diligent students, despite putting in their best efforts, could not get the first or second or third rank in their classes. The Class 12 students whose aggregate failed to hit the magic figure of 90% in the AISSCE results announced on Friday (May 23) don’t have to avoid inquisitive friends and relatives loaded with difficult questions and nasty comments.
Students with moderate marks ain’t losers so they should not be seen sulking and snivelling over something that was not in their control. It’s sheer luck that some of their otherwise average class-fellows got distinction in various subjects. Depression should be the last thing on the faces of not-so-lucky girls and boys. Ignoring all stares and remarks, they must descend upon fast food joints with pals celebrating their feat. After all they belong to the majority. Don’t they?
No one can deny them the right to feel being on top of the world. Every serious student who burnt midnight oil and wrote exams honestly naturally feels he has conquered the world after the results are announced. It is time to relax, to treat and pamper ourselves as final results have heralded a new dawn and a tiring months-long journey of non-stop studies has come to an end.
And those parents whose habit is to poke wards for not coming up to “their” expectations are advised to turn searchlights inwards. Their educational record was below average if not dismal in most cases. If such parents dare question the seriousness of their children, they can expect a powerful counter-attack. Ask them what grades they got in metric or Class 12 exams and most of them will be found trying to change the topic.
All students try their best, but it is destiny that some are able to answer questions better during those three tense hours. Those who fared well in three hours should not consider themselves reincarnation of William Wordsworth or Ibn Sina because the fate of a student is determined by many a factor. Tuition plays a key role. It’s hardly surprising that those students whose parents could afford BD100-a-month private coaching passed exams with flying colours. And those whose parents find it difficult to make ends meet were bound not to excel, as they could not afford that luxury. Therefore, getting just pass marks is perfectly all right as they can’t be blamed for being less privileged.
Mugging up answers of oft-repeated questions without understanding their meaning is an art some students perfect and some don’t. The idea is to fool teachers into believing that they are marking the copy of the brightest student. Some teachers fall for it without realising that the same student may not even recall the 10 per cent of what he wrote a week ago. So those who don’t learn by rote and explain in their own words deserve praise and some encouragement. But what they get instead is average marks without citation.
A student, no matter how hardworking, may not be able to do justice to studies if he or she faced a long illness during the academic year. Time waits for no one. If such a student is unable to concentrate on studies, his or her enthusiasm and sense of responsibility cannot be doubted. Who knows he or she would be the topper if not fallen ill.
Gone are the days when journalists thronged the house of star students whose 75% marks would be considered exemplary. Parents would tell their sons and daughters to “do like them.” Today 75% is “so-so”, not even good, forget excellent. To come in the category of “good” one has to secure 85% to 90% marks at least. And excellent is 90% or above.
Unfortunately, we are living in the era of “educational terrorism” where exams appear as of a deliberate act of aggression and mental torture. Syllabuses are massive and getting bigger by the year. Schoolbags of nursery kids weigh not less than 4kg. Higher students are committing suicides for not being able to enter prestigious courses or institutions because of low marks. In our times, no student would take such an extreme step. There were no counselling centres to address post-result trauma.
In good old days, there were no funny expectations from parents. They didn’t even know the exam dates of their kids. No one had heard of IIMs, IITs, Birlas and NIITs. MBBS and MBA used to be benchmarks of success. Options were clear and easy. A student would like either to be a doctor, or an engineer, or a lecturer, or an advocate or (if nothing is possible) a journalist. And if you were committed to doing nothing great in life, you could still end up in a primary school as a TGT or a clerk in a government bank.
Today, education has become a major concern for parents. It is they who start getting nightmares before board exams. The worst fear is that the child would not be able to get admission in the desired stream and college if he or she got below cut-off. To make the dream come true, expensive tuitions are arranged. Loans are taken, parties are cancelled, relatives are told to visit some other time and trips to home country are postponed. Every step is taken to avoid financial hassles. And, in the end, if the ward does not come up to the parents’ expectations, everybody is in depression. This emotional roller-coaster is completely avoidable. Parents should just let the child do his own thing. Excellent educational performance and a secure financial future are not, I repeat not, correlated.
Those who could not make Aristotle and Socrates blush this year can always look up to blue-collared jobs and climb up the career ladder with the same dedication and commitment they showed in school. A uniformed, satisfied and smiling construction supervisor at a building site appears better than a zombie genius wearing thick glasses staring at the screen.
Dry studies are deadly boring. Mix it with some bunking and prank. Have a guffaw even if you are not a topper. This is not the end of the world.