They say, “The relationship between a parent and child is much like a rope. Each positive interaction between them adds a new thread and strengthens the overall emotional connection”.
Being a parent is a blessing. Being a child is even more blissful. Some of us can still relate to the above quote but for most, it would be just another saying. The bond between the two is supposedly unbreakable. If this was said years ago, all of us would unanimously agree to it without any further thought. But if I were to tell a youngster of today that the only people to have cared for you unconditionally are your parents, there would definitely be a second thought, at least for a split second, and such is the case with most of the youth today, especially the Muslim youth.
There are several reasons for this abominable prevalence. The fact that there were lesser distractions earlier is often ignored. Youngsters are under constant pressure of temptations from all directions which demand attention from parents. But this too is not given much heed in most of the Muslim households. They either look at it listlessly (being ignorant of the advancements the youth of today have made) as a momentary whim which is less frequent but in a surprising or the more orthodox way, become vexed at it, chide and send the child away, shutting all doors of conversation.
The latter is most common with alarming consequences! Because every time a door of communication is shut, it only sends children farther away from their parents. Children yearn to talk and to be heard and if they are made devoid of this, they will go looking around for friends. And, if luck favours, they may find proper company; if not, they tend to fall into all sorts of relationships, commit heinous sins and fall into a pit of deep regret, which they can never come out of.
If this were to happen in a family where the parents are not practising Muslims, it would be ‘understandable’. But it is so ironical that children of practising Muslim parents most frequently tend to deviate from the right path. The mother or the father is so busy with organising public gatherings, distributing alms among the poor, donating money to orphanages, inviting people to Islam, and what not, completely unaware of their children watching a movie, or listening to music, or worse, talking to a na-mehram!
Hypocrisy has so innately taken its roots into our households that if you were to attend a wedding where most of the practising men and women were to gather, one would find it extremely difficult to relate the children with their parents! We have forgotten that piety or Taqwa is not hereditary but is developed from years of training, learning and understanding…
Let us remind ourselves that the message of Islam must be first taught to our near and dear ones in the way the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be with him) was ordered to in the early days of his prophethood. Let us remind ourselves how he spent time with his wives and children and helped with household chores.
The above mentioned quote would be true in every sense if the relationship between a parent and a child is kept as clear and transparent as possible. Talking or listening to their woes or whims, letting them know the right and wrong, acknowledging and encouraging them, or even just spending weekends at home would go a long way in developing bright, confident youngsters, who love themselves as Muslims and do not feel ashamed to identify themselves as one. This is of dire importance because it is the need of the hour. And if it becomes a reality, Insha Allah, we will not just belong to just a Muslim household, but an Ideal Muslim household.