The Qur’ān (4:34) states: “Men stand caretakers of women since Allah has made some of them excel the others, and because they have spent of their wealth.”
The role of men, concerning women, has been defined in this ayah through the word, qawwam which has been translated in various ways, the most common being in the sense of hakim or one who rules, governs, or decides. Other substitutes used are guardians, custodians and protectors, when taken in the sense of a career, a functional head, and not in the political sense of a ruler or dictator.
The family is the first institution in human life and its influence is felt at every stage of life. The running and administration of other institutions, such as those engaged in financial, industrial and commercial affairs are normally assigned to those who are most qualified for the job by their education, training and natural abilities. It is only logical that the same rule is applied to the family, the institution that looks after the upbringing of man.
Both man and woman are the creation of Allah. He does not do injustice to His Creation. Indeed, He gives each of His creatures the abilities and talents that befit the duties assigned to them. The rights of women are as incumbent upon men as the rights of men are upon women, and the rights of both are similar to each other, with only one exception that men have certain precedence in functional authority, although this too is hemmed with other balancing factors. As explained in another ayah of the Qur’ān, this authority placed on the shoulders of man is not that of a dictator or tyrant. While exercising this authority, man is bound by Islamic Shari’ah. He must act on the principle of consultation and follow good counsel. He just cannot act at the spur of his whims. The command given to him is: “Treat women well, as recognised.”
In another ayah (2-233) men have been instructed to act in consultation with wives in family affairs. After this clarification, the technical authority of man should not be a source of anxiety for women. Still, given the probability that women may take this arrangement unhappily, Allah did not restrict the text on proclaiming the authority of man but explained two reasons for this authority. The first reason “Allah has made some of them excel the others”. This is an Allah-given grace. Men have done nothing to get it and there is nothing wrong with women that they do not have it. It is simply based on the design of the creation, an exclusive privilege of the Creator. The second reason “because they have spent of their wealth” which mean that men spend their money, pay mehr and take the responsibility of meeting all needs of women. Hence the precedence.
Allah willed to make men and women, two halves of the same soul: “Mankind, fear your Lord, who has created you from a single soul, and from it created its mate.” (the Qur’an – 4:1) Because the two mates are two halves of the same soul, they stand in the same position in Allah’s sight. Therefore, the precedence of man does not cause any lowering of the status of women. The second reason given for the precedence of men is that they spend their earnings to take care of women. Here too, there are some points to ponder. To begin with, it removes the possible doubt that may creep up due to the share of men being twice that of women as described in the ayah of inheritance. The present ayah declares that all financial responsibilities rest with men. As for women, all her financial responsibilities before her marriage rest with her father and after marriage, these pass on to the husband. With this in view, giving a twofold share to a man is not too much, for it returns to women after all.
Allah has created human beings as males and females, following the “dual” rule which is central to the system of creation. He has given the woman the glorious task of childbearing, breast-feeding and looking after her children. These are not tasks which can be fulfilled without careful preparation, physically, psychologically, and mentally. It is only just, therefore, that the other part, i.e. the man, should be assigned the task of providing the essential needs and the protection required for the woman to fulfil her highly important duties. She could not be given all those tasks and still be required to work for earning her living.
Among the qualities the woman has been given are tenderness, quick reaction, an instinctive response to the needs of children, without the need for much deliberation and reflection. On the other hand, among the qualities a man is given are toughness, slow reaction and response, as well as proper thought and reflection before action. Earning his family’s living is part of being in charge. Moreover, looking after the finances of the family is closer to his family duties.
In highlighting these two elements, the Qur’ān states that in Islamic society men are required to look after women. The man has the proper natural abilities to take charge of the family affairs, a role essential for the proper progress of human life. It is a simple fact that one party is properly equipped for this role and assigned the duty to play it while the other is not. Hence, it is unfair that the latter party should be required, in any situation, to take up these responsibilities in addition to its own. If women are given the necessary practical and scientific training to fulfil these duties, their ability to play the other role, i.e. that of motherhood, is undermined. However, it does not by any means lead to the negation of the woman’s character and role in the family, home and society. Nor does it mean the cancellation of her civil status. It simply defines her role within the family and how it is run.
Keeping this in view, it is not possible to deduce that the status of woman has been reduced by making them dependent on man in the matter of her expenses. There is no value judgment being made here. This is no more than a functional distribution of duties, except that, the inter-acting precedence between duties which exists elsewhere exists here too. In short, the two reasons given show that the precedence of men does not lower the status of women, nor does this hold any special gain for them. Whatever gain there is, it reverts to women after all. Allah’s Messenger (peace and blessings of Allah be to him) said: “All of you are guardians and responsible for your ward. The ruler is a guardian and the man is a guardian of his family, the lady is a guardian and is responsible for her husband’s house and his offspring; and so all you are guardians and are responsible for your wards.” (Sahih Bukhari)