In addition to praying and fasting during the month of Ramadhan, the month also serves as a training platform in which a Muslim mother can introduce the basics of Islam to her children and benefit more from Ramadhan. Dr Saima Naeem Bilal, MD (OBG) – Unani Medicine, Kuwait, suggests some effective tips to help mothers set their Ramadhan Goals.
The blessed month of Ramadhan has started. It is the month of the Qur’ān and we all want to make the Qur’ān the centre of our time in Ramadhan. We entered this month with great enthusiasm and zeal. We have our bucket full of wishlists but somewhere in the chaos of being the perfect mother, we lost that touch, that special bond, one that we crave.
After 3-4 days we start to realise that we cannot accomplish our goals. I am a mother of a newborn, a toddler, and a grown-up child. How can I benefit more from Ramadhan? Abdullah ibn Umar reported: The Messenger of Allah ﷺsaid, “Every one of you is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock. The leader of the people is a guardian and is responsible for his subjects. A man is the guardian of his family and he is responsible for them. A woman is the guardian of her husband’s home and his children and she is responsible for them. The servant of a man is a guardian of the property of his master and he is responsible for it. No doubt, every one of you is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock.”(Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī7138, Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 1829) Every guardian will be asked about those under his or her care.
Mother is the first learning centre of a child and plays an important part in introducing the child to the world. The child’s outlook toward life depends a lot on the mother. Children’s attitudes, religious views, perspectives, and goals all will be gained from her. So, it is the duty of every mother to look into better techniques and strategies for Parenting. Mothers should set realistic goals and should also include kids’ activities, too.
Ramadhan is the best time to introduce Islamic principles and train children accordingly. Here is a list of Qur’ān-related goals mothers can set for themselves as well as ideas on how to involve children in Ramadhan activities.
Recitation of the Qur’ān
One should set a goal to recite at least a portion of the Qur’ān with translation. Complete recitation of the whole Qur’ān carries a great reward but if it is not possible, recite at least 5-10 ayah in a day with meaning. Prophet Muhammadﷺsaid, “For the best deeds are those done regularly even if they are few.” (Ibn Majah) Children also realise the importance of recitation by observing mothers.
Memorise Surah with child. Mother can select some Surah from the last chapter of the Qur’ān and memorise it with the child. Teaching the Qur’ān carries great weight. The Messenger of Allah ﷺsaid, “The best among you is the one who learns the Qur’ān and teaches it.” (Al-Bukhari)
Listen to the tafsīr of selected surah and plan a time of short duration for ijtima daily with family.
Find duas in the Qur’ān and memorise them: Mothers can select some short duas from the Qur’ān and memorise them with little children. They can also make the children understand their meaning.
Learning some names of Allah: Recite them, read about their meanings, and discuss them with the child.
Open Discussions with Children
Try to open up discussions with children and family about some of the regular topics associated with Ramadhan such as; fasting, reading the Qur’an, making dua’a, prayer, charity, the last 10 days of Ramadhan, and its importance. A good way to start brainstorming what to teach your children is to ask yourself a few questions. Why do you as an adult look forward to Ramadhan? What about the holy month makes you plan in advance and wait in anticipation? What words would you use to describe this blessed month?
Share Qur’ān Stories with Children
Find stories from the Qur’ān, read them, understand them and then share them with children over Iftar, suhoor, or bedtime.
Mothers can do this while putting the kids to bed. Make it short and reflective.
Ask children what they think of the story, how they feel, and what they learned from it.
Bonding over the lessons:What Allah teaches us through stories is something children will cherish all their lives and it will set a loving relationship with the Book of Allah.
Stories can include Musa (as) as a baby, Yusuf (as) and his brothers, the people of the cave, Suleiman (as) and the ants, Story of the elephants. There are just so many to engage their minds with.
Get Support: Speak to your husband or other family members about your Qur’ān goals. Get support from them. Don’t shy away from asking for help.
Invest in books of Seerat un Nabi appropriate for the child’s age. Use the child’s bedtime to share Seerat un Nabi stories.
Get some simple activities planned for the kids:
Younger children may not be able to physically fast during Ramadhan, but they can still do so much to feel the beauty that comes with this month and learn about its importance.
Some ideas are Moon and Star-shaped cookies, Cardboard or Paper Masjid, Cut and colouring your own Ka’ba, making a Ramadhan countdown calendar, Make a good deed calendar or chart. Sadaqah (Charity) jar, Ramadhan word games, designing your own Ramadhan and Eid greeting cards, creating a special corner for Salah and Tarawih in the home, writing duas of Iftar and Suhoor.
Plan to do only one or two small things every day to help build positive memories.
Involve the Children in daily activities like laying tables, making juices, etc. Educate them to control anger.
Sadaqah (Charity): Children can be encouraged to donate money and they can help as you prepare food items to give away to the less privileged.
All of these acts will help re-enforce what Ramadhan is all about and allow mothers to build a strong foundation of faith in them from an early age that can be added every year.
In a nutshell, in addition to praying and fasting during the month of Ramadhan, the month also serves as a training platform in which a Muslim mother can introduce the basics of Islam to her children and benefit more from Ramadhan.