“We enjoined upon man to be dutiful to his parents. His mother bore him in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning lasted two years. (We, therefore, enjoined upon him): “Give thanks to Me and your parents. To Me is your ultimate return.” (Surah 31:14)
The institution of family is the foundation of a society and nation. A family is formed when a man and a woman enter into a contract through the institution of marriage. In Islam, the marriage contract and the formation of a family are guided by divine sanction and bounded by piety, love, and fear of the Almighty along with a strong belief in the accountability before the Creator of this universe. The family of two individuals grows, children become adults, parents grow older, and children become parents and generate new families. This cycle evolves, grows, and expands continuously.
The strong force, which carries out this unending growth, is the love instilled by the Creator who loves His creation immensely. This love between husband and wife, between parents and children, and between close blood relations is the central force, which develops and sustains human society. A strong belief in the accountability before the Creator, zeal to seek the pleasure of the Almighty, and fear of His anger and punishment make one fulfil one’s duties and establish justice in the family and society.
An individual and a society without this belief and motivating force fall prey to greed, vanity, materialism, and the craze for worldly luxuries and pleasures. This behaviour, attitude, and way of life hit the most vulnerable part of society, children, elderly persons, and women. The elderly persons after giving everything to society become the most ignored and neglected section in a materialistic society.
This problem has become more serious in the last three to four decades. Some countries have a growing aging population. Japan tops that list today. It has 28% of its population above the age of 65. European countries and the USA are having a similar aging pattern. Fortunately, due to religiousness, strong cultural traditions, and the lack of an education system that develops a materialistic and selfish way of life, we Indians are in a comparatively better condition compared to the developed world as far as the situation of elderly persons is concerned. As per 2018 data, 703 million people in the world are more than 65. This population of elderly persons has increased from 6% in 1990 to 9% in 2019.
There are 728 old age homes in India at present. The existing capacity of these old age homes throughout India is around 97,000. The demand for capacity might increase approximately 8 to 10 times in the next 10 years. It shows the rising trend of elderly people being sent to old age homes or themselves opting to go there. However, the situation in India is much better compared to developed countries. In India, still, a large majority of elderly persons reside with their families.
For people who are leading an extremely materialistic way of life, the elderly persons are a liability to society. The cases of misbehaviour and deserting parents are also increasing, even in highly educated families. If we look at this problem through the prism of various religious communities, the situation of elderly people is much better in the Muslim society. The main reason behind this is the Islamic culture and teachings regarding parents, elderly persons, and close relatives. The joint family system is still prevailing in the Muslim society and even if it is in a diluted form, the families are still well connected.
The Qur’ānic teachings and traditions of the last Prophet ﷺ give clear guidance and instructions to Muslims to respect and care for the parents, especially when they become old and need help. The Qur’ān says in Surah Bani Israel – “Your Lord has decreed: (i) Do not worship any but Him (ii) Be good to your parents; and should both or any one of them attain old age with you, do not say to them even fie neither chide them, but speak to them with respect, and be humble and tender to them and say: Lord, show mercy to them as they nurtured me when I was small.” (Surah 17:23-24).
In Surah Luqman of the Qur’ān, the duties of a person towards his/her parents have been explicitly narrated. “We enjoined upon man to be dutiful to his parents. His mother bore him in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning lasted two years. (We, therefore, enjoined upon him): “Give thanks to Me and your parents. To Me is your ultimate return.” (Surah 31:14)
The parents have been repeatedly mentioned in the Qur’ān at several places to emphasise the importance of respecting, taking care of, and fulfilling their needs and helping them when they are old. There are also a large number of Prophet’s sayings (Ahadith) in this regard. According to the Prophet ﷺ: “Paradise is beneath the feet of your mother, and your father is the door of Paradise. If any Muslim looks at his/her parents with love, he would gain the same reward like that of Hajj.”
The teachings of Islam have given much importance to respecting and caring for old parents. These teachings and their embedded culture has promoted respect and care in the Muslim society. The teachings and guidance of the Qur’ān also enjoins Muslims to look after and help and support their near blood relations, financially and otherwise. Maintaining good relations and giving due rights to close relations has been made obligatory upon Muslims by the Almighty Allah. A tradition of Prophet Muhammad ﷺ clearly states: “The person who doesn’t care to protect the relations (with close blood relatives), is not from us.” Although the Islamic social system assures help, support, and respect for the elderly by their children or their close relatives, still in some cases if there is no one to take care of them, the government must look after them and promise them a dignified and respectful life.
Although all major religions and their scriptures have some teachings regarding respecting and taking care of parents and other elderly persons in the society, the Islamic teachings are very explicit and link it to the pleasure or displeasure of the Almighty and Allah’s reward or punishment in the hereafter. It is so because all religions and religious scriptures have some element of the divine guidance derived from what was revealed to the Prophets of that time. Since the Qur’ān is fully preserved in its original form and in the same form in which it was revealed to the last Prophet Muhammad ﷺ, its instructions are very clear and explicit. The life of the last Prophet ﷺand his sayings and traditions are also preserved up to a large extent. There remains no ambiguity and doubt about anything.
However, the problem of ignoring and not giving due respect and rights to elderly persons is creeping slowly into the Muslim society as well. It is mainly due to the lack of proper understanding of the wisdom of Islamic teachings and systems and due to weakness in practising these values and guidance.
Despite all this, the Muslim society is in a much better position with regards to respect and protecting the rights of elderly persons. This also because despite a large number of weaknesses, Islam is still the most practised religion on earth. We must convey the message of Islam i.e. the guidance revealed by our Creator to all fellow human beings and present the true example of a Muslim and an Islamic society by following Islam in totality.